Ignite / kofi / inprnt / art archive @chromacandescent / photography @solarsubtractive / What happens when you crop the skies? What happens when you frame the clouds? To capture an image you kill it first. You'll have to do more than looking to revive it. § writing #ignitedink § art #ignitedart.
also I fucking hate those “if lgbt discussion isn’t allowed in schools than neither should pregnant teachers because she’s showing everyone that she got CUMMED INSIDE🤢 lol she’s teaching kids about her breeding kink” posts because 1) what an odd way to think and talk about pregnant people even if it’s just for a gotcha own. weird. anyways 2) are we just going to pretend that pregnant people don’t experience workplace discrimination? that reproductive rights aren’t politicians’ favorite bargaining chip? that pregnant people can’t face other forms of discrimination including medical abuse and social alienation? that murder isn’t a leading cause of death for pregnant people? that there wasn’t a time teachers had to sign contracts promising they wouldn’t get pregnant or could face termination? okay
Literally pregnant people are an oppressed class, I don’t know how better to explain it to people. Pregnancy is disabling, and it doesn’t help that there’s people (on both sides of the political spectrum) don’t treat it as such and refuse accomodations because “well you chose that”. Pregnant people are less likely to be hired, even in workplaces that don’t demand manual labour, because “oh well they won’t work as much because of bathroom breaks and maternity leave”. And there is a *huge* pressure for pregnant teachers to take the shortest possible maternity leave because “think of your students!!” And then once the baby is born and the parent returns to work, if the baby is fed breast milk they now have to negotiate breaks for pumping, and while in the US it’s technically legally required to provide a space for that, it usually ends up being a corner in the public bathroom or a dark and musty supply closet.
And saying “oh well don’t get pregnant then lol” is an impossible demand and also fascist. Telling people who face job insecurity to just not reproduce is fascist.
somehow, amazingly, i have hacked the impulse that makes me mindlessly scroll on my phone. it’s not gone but i’ve paired it with a conscious thought process that goes like, “what’s my goal here? i’m looking for entertainment, for information, for something that makes me feel more optimistic and interested in the world i live in…”
and because that kicks in between apps, too, i’m not doomscrolling as much. i’m intentionally seeking out posts or videos or whatever that actually mean something to me. when i’m not satisfied i walk away or pick up a book instead. most subtle yet impactful change i’ve gone through in years
i did not intentionally set out to change this. i’ve just been working on my mindset in general. hey, turns out having a good therapist again helps
thank you to everyone who has liked this post for reminding me to keep up the habit. just caught myself doomscrolling and remembered i have a nice podcast i could be listening to instead
those first couple weeks after escaping a time loop have gotta be disorienting as all fuck. all those little cues that used to tell you what’s about to happen are now triggers that cause you to brace for something that isn’t coming. you have to relearn the permanence of death – hell, you have reacquaint yourself with the entire concept of finality altogether. everything keeps changing but it never changes back and you keep having to remind yourself that this is normal. “it won’t reset anymore,” you echo to yourself, over and over and over, like a broken record, like you’re still trapped in a loop, like someone who escaped the time loop but was doomed to bring it into the future with them
life is like I have 34 unread messages from people I love and I know it’ll take 2 seconds to respond and I miss them, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to answer quite yet I have 5 minutes in the morning to decide if I’ll commit my day’s attention to creative projects I want to get done, taking a walk or a bike ride, organizing hair cuts and braving dentist appointments or if I don’t catch myself in time, the day will be swallowed up in scrolling, my focus flitting between screens I don’t know where the time goes because I used to be small and know so much and now I’m flirting with the end of my twenties and am so scared of everything how does this both feel so new and mundane all the time and where is the exit door to this spiral where I remember living gently, full breaths and unknotted shoulders can we look for that resting place together oh no it’s fine if you’re busy I wouldn’t know where to start we can try next week if it’s better
